TechWire

Pat Kenny -- a different view

There has been a lot of comment about Pat Kenny stepping down from the Late Late. I only have a personal anecdote to add.

My mother used to work in RTE (up until 1982). At that time, she knew Kenny quite well.

Four years ago, she turned 60 years of age. As a birthday present, I went around her old acquaintances and friends with a camcorder to get a birthday message from them.

I rang Kenny. At the time, he was going through a lot busy stuff. But not only did he immediately say yes to it, he said I could come onto the set of the Late Late and that he would record the message from there.

On the appointed Friday night, I turned up. He brought me out onto the stage, where I set up my cheap camcorder and tripod. He spoke for two full minutes (which is quite a long time, as anyone who's tried to make a video podcast knows).

When he was finished, he insisted on walking me out to the front door of the RTE television building. This, with five minutes to go until the show started.

So call Kenny anything you like. To me, the guy is a courteous, thoughtful gentleman.

12 writing rules to improve your company's chance of publicity

When it comes to writing an article or a press release for a newspaper, the overall theme or format is important (as I have posted here, here and here).

But there is another consideration: style. Style includes language, diction and vocabulary. Although this may not seem crucial (and, in truth, it is less important than the actual facts being presented), it can lessen an article's chance of making it to publication.

Here are a few basic language/vocabulary/style rules to follow when writing an article or press release.

1. Try to avoid humour
Please, do yourself and your company a favour: avoid jokes. When people write an article for submission, they are tempted to try and inject 'colour' into it. But jokes, humourous asides and amusing anecdotes fail 90 per cent of the time. Because here's the sad truth: you're probably not funny. Even if you are the sharpest wit in the office, you're probably not a funny writer. In fairness, very few people are (and that includes mainstream journalists and columnists who imagine that they have the amusing touch). Not only is the 'colour' cut out, it creates resentment for having created work for the editor. Especially when that editor is living off coffee, 20 minutes past his deadline.

2. Don't use capitals
Since When Did Every Single Bloody Word Become Eligible For Caps? Try to avoid the following: "the Managing Director of X Company is responsible for Customer Service and the Implementation of a Customer Charter for all of X's Valued Clients". Sorry, but capitals are reserved for proper names, place names and acronyms. That means that everything else, including job titles or technical processes, do not take capitals.

3. Don't use exclamation marks
Such as: "Murphy said that the only thing missing from his clients' customer experience was a candelabra!" Is that funny? No. Did that exclamation mark add any positive effect to the point? No. Please don't use them.

4. Don't use assuming terms
Don't start sentences with 'Interestingly' or 'Tellingly' or 'Significantly'. The reader will decide whether it's significant or interesting or telling, thank you very much. And they'll do it based on the evidence of your point, not your guide.

5. Try not to use 'UK'
Yes, the UK is a political and geographical fact. But it is almost never advisable for use in an Irish newspaper. And it does not make you sound more professional. Once you mention the UK, you get yourself into a bind; if your service is also available in Dublin and Cork, what territory do you refer to them as? Eire? (Big no-no.) The South? (Also a no-no.) The Republic? (Still a no-no.) And then how do you define the territory that comprises Derry? The UK again? Avoid this conundrum: just use 'Ireland and Britain'. Like it or not, the UK puts you into a political sphere that can only detract from your appeal.

6. Don't write long sentences
Are any of your sentences over 20 words long? Then they're too long. Sorry, but unless you're a masterful wordsmith, your epic sentences are likely to be far too meandering to be easily followed. And that means your point gets lost. If in doubt, simply break the sentence up into two (or three) smaller sentences. And don't be worried if this makes them sound 'simple'. We like simple. We love simple. Please: give us more simple.

7. Don't give us American spellings
It's realise, not realize. And it's organisation, not organization. If (and it's a lot less likely if there's a lot of work to do on it) your article is considered for publication, all of those mistakes have to be corrected first. Yes, we know that Microsoft's spellchecker changes them automatically. But that's your problem. Send us correct spellings please.

8. Don't litter your copy with dashes and semi-colons
A couple of dashes and semi-colons is fine. More than a couple of them is not fine at all. It makes the sentences look sloppy. Just cut out the dashes. Shorten the sentences or re-arrange them.

9. Don't use word processing effects
Articles written in fancy fonts or spaced way apart do not impress editors. At all. Most would choose a simple black-on-white e-mail using courier or Times font, rather than the papyrus effects that some firms think looks impressive. Don't 'centre' your copy or keep bolding and italicising it. Just give us ordinary, normally spaced paragraphs in a simple font.

10. Don't include ©, ™ or ®
Have you ever seen a newspaper or magazine article include one of these symbols? No. So don't include them, regardless of what 'legal' says.

11. Don't expect your brand's 'clever' lettering to be represented
Because we will ignore it. When Telecom Eireann became Eircom, the company used the lower case 'e' (as in eircom). And they would send out releases staring sentences with a lower-case eircom. As in: "eircom today announces a fantastic new broadband package." And every paper changed it to 'Eircom'. And, initially, Eircom's PR department were irked. Ebay (or eBay, as they call it) is another case in point. Well, tough luck guys. The laws of English don't change because of your branding preferences. That especially goes for Yahoo (or Yahoo! as they would have me write it). Sorry, I'm not putting an exclamation mark in the middle of a sentence. Ever.

12. Don't expect your long-winded corporate title to be quoted
I have often changed a title such as 'commercial manager with responsibility for corporate accountsin Ireland' to 'sales manager'. Don't like the sound of that? Sorry. We have space constraints. And your title is too long.

The dangers of running for election when you're on Facebook

This is Emma Kiernan, a Fine Gael local election candidate for Newbridge Town Council. As has been pointed out (by Evert Bopp and others), she has some colourful pictures on Facebook (for the full pic, go here: I cropped the other faces out).

I honestly don't know whether this will help or hinder her attempt to get elected (or whether it was cunningly conceived as a PR stunt). But to all those running for election: make sure you're happy with your publicly-accessible Facebook images.

Edit: (7pm) Kiernan has taken the picture down and protected her Facebook page. Sensible!

The annual telecoms ball: tired and emotional

I attended Ibec's annual telecoms ball on Friday night. Normally, this is a great night when senior industry figures really let their hair down and talk freely about things. This year, it was a muted, tense affair.
It was well attended (as usual), but few executives were smiling or laughing throughout. The charity auction -- which usually generates a lot of money for a chosen worthy cause -- was especially muted. I tried to liven it up by bidding several times (up to €700) on a signed lead guitar from The Blizzards (which eventually sold for €850), but to no avail.
Whereas people normally stay until the wee hours, there was a clearout around midnight. (In fairness, this may have been helped to the band, which played 1980s soft rock numbers.)
Hopefully, next year will see a return to madcap antics.

Meteor prepares its 14.4Mbs 3G broadband service

I was at a briefing yesterday on Meteor's plans for its 3G broadband service. Here are the main points discussed.

1. The company will soon start to switch over to 14.4Mbs (its service now is an 'up to' 7.2Mbs service). The speed displayed on its test site in Galway was 11Mbs, though this was on a dedicated cell site; on an open, public site, this would be slower

2. The average data usage among Meteor's current 3G broadband user base is 2.2 gigabytes per month

3. Meteor will not change its 5 gigabyte monthly data cap anytime soon: however, it will keep an eye on this and may review the cap at the end of this year

4. Meteor has almost 8,000 3G broadband customers since its launch earlier this year. It describes this figure as being "ahead of schedule"

5. Meteor's current 3G broadband service is available in Dublin, Cork, Drogheda, Naas and one or two other towns close to Dublin. It has begun rolling the service out in Galway

6. Asked about the future of its 2G network, the company said that it would maintain this until 2020

Majority of big Irish companies' IT dept chiefs earn €100k plus

According to a survey of 135 Irish IT department heads (in large Irish companies), a six-figure salary is the norm. Over two thirds still get bonuses, too, despite the recession.

Unsurprisingly, 90 per cent are happy with their position, and a third said that they wouldn't consider being poached to another job, regardless of what a headhunter offered them.

The survey was done by Harvey Nash. It's part of a Europe-wide survey, but 135 of the respondents were from Irish companies.

Now the bad news: IT departments will be cut over the next year, despite already having been cut in the last year. And this compares very negatively with European big firms, the majority of which are not cutting their IT department budgets.

Once again, when it comes to the true believers in the value of IT, Irish firms just aren't at the races, no matter what the politically correct thing to say is.

Yes of course I'll give you my account details...

Dear AIB Code Card Holder,

Due to the high rate of fraud, we have decided to put an extra security to help us secure you and your money while you use the Code Cards for withdrawals and Online purchases. With effect from May 10th 2009, an extra verification will be introduced to make your transaction more secure and protect your from these fraudsters, this measure will include an sms/email  verification which will be sent to Mobile Number or Email addresses.

Due to this, you are requested to Verify/Register your Account Information’s including your phone number (Code/cards) and email addresses where verification codes will be sent to.

Please Register/Activate your Account now by clicking HERE or visit www.aib.ie/activ/ and then do as required. (Failure to verify your Account details correctly will lead to immediate Account suspension)

Be notified that all Account and Code Cards must be registered On or Before
20th May 2009. Failure to register your Account will lead to Account suspension.


Thank you.

Allied Irish Banks p.l.c
Bankcentre, Ballsbridge,
Dublin 4, Registered No. 24173
Ireland

Web 2.0 bullshit generator

If you want to generate fancy sounding IT jargon out of thin air, this is pretty funny. (Via Social Media Expert.)

A cruel kind of marketing trickery

This is one of the most disingenuous, misleading company PR releases I have seen so far this year.

It promises something for free. But it's a million miles from free. It gives the impression that it is doing something to lift our community. And that is nowhere near the intention.

I've already seen positive chatter about this 'offer' on Twitter and elsewhere among people who didn't look at the small print (and in fairness to them, the company's website doesn't give any relevant small print).

[PR release begins]

Irish Technology Company, Adwalker, Announce Plans to Invest €2m to Help Businesses through the Current Recession

Adwalker to give its Gen:3 product to hundreds of Irish companies in order to help stimulate consumer activity across a range of sectors

Dublin, May 20th, 2009: Irish company Adwalker, one of the world’s leading providers of wearable computing  has revealed the next generation of its digital wearable  product named Gen:3.

To celebrate this milestone in the company’s development and in acknowledgement of the challenges that are currently being experienced by most businesses selling to the consumer sector at this time, Adwalker has decided to offer the first 2,000 units of its product to companies who can use it to help stimulate consumer demand and drive direct sales, free of charge. Adwalker anticipate the Irish market to take up to 400 units of the global 2,000 allocation.

Commenting on the decision to invest in the economy in this manner CEO, Simon Crisp said: "In times of recession businesses, ourselves included, need to use innovative means to drive sales... If we can help to encourage consumers to re-engage in the economy we can help to shorten the tenure of the downturn. We hope that by offering our patented product at no cost we will encourage people to use a proven tool for generating consumer demand."

While the first 2,000 units distributed will be available at no cost, there will be a small fee associated with activating the unit. This will be under €10 per day and there is no limit to the amount of days or hours that the system can be in use. The retail price of each free unit is expected to be around €5,000 in the future.

Adwalker is inviting customers interested in availing of this unique offer to visit www.adwalker.com to pre order their free units now.

[PR release ends]

From this release, you are left thinking:

1. Adwalker is giving away an amazing €5,000 device for free
2. It is doing this because it is a really decent company and it wants to give something back
3. There'll be a tiny, nominal charge of under €10 per day if you want to use it

Now here are the facts, after I contacted both the company itself and the PR firm involved.

1. To claim the free machine, you must pay Adwalker €3,650 (plus Vat) -- the '€10 per day' must be paid for a minimum contract of 365 days
2. That money doesn't even buy you the device: you only lease it for one year
3. If you want to keep it after the year is up, you must pay them another €3,650 (plus Vat)

Isn't this disingenuous?

I spoke to Simon Crisp, the company's chief executive, who I have a lot of respect for. I put it to him that this was disingenuous. He didn't agree, pointing out that it is a big, big discount on the usual rental price of an Adwalker device, which is €150 per day.

I think that every firm is giving discounts at the moment. I don't think that it's kosher to dress it up a discounted offer as something free, especially something offered as an act of civic solidarity.

Where front-running Dublin MEP candidates stand on an EU army

Sorry, another bit on politics.

Can you guess which major Dublin MEP candidates stand for the following EU military policies?

Position: "We propose the commitment by every Member State to pool future research on weapons and military technologies: drones, satellites, soldiers' equipment, anti-missile systems and next generation major weapon systems (tanks, aircraft etc). The European Defence Agency would naturally be the coordinator of these programmes. We would like to include European defence within political and military mutual assistance in close relations with Nato. We propose the identification by each Member State of the industrial, technological, military, financial and human resources that they are ready to commit in the framework of Community solidarity and the European Security Strategy."

-- Candidate: Gay Mitchell MEP, Fine Gael's Dublin candidate for the European Parliament. (More here.)

Position 2: "In the long run, the European Security and Defence Policy (ESDP) should be further developed, including by increasing the synergies and integration between European forces. There must be a better coordination and use of synergies between EU and NATO to promote common interests and address common challenges in the global arena. The ESDP should develop in parallel to NATO and competition should be avoided. A strong ESDP contributes also to NATO’s interests."

-- Candidate: Proinsias de Rossa MEP, candidate for the Labour Party. (More here.)

Position 3: "The EU should play an important role in contributing effectively to global security, where appropriate in co-operation with NATO structures. Therefore we call for major new efforts to strengthen and extend the European Security and Defence Policy by bringing together European defence-related resources and capabilities. This would enhance the EU’s military defence cooperation and its responsiveness to international security and humanitarian emergencies."

-- Candidate: Eoin Ryan MEP, Fianna Fail candidate. (More here.)

And you thought that Irish MEPs were pro-neutrality?

(For the record, I do think that a European army is probably a sensible idea, in the long run. But you'd never get an Irish MEP candidate to admit that publicly. You'd swear they were all members of CND. Now you know where they really stand, according to their manifestos.)

No sex please, we're work-mad SME directors

According to an O2 survey into 300 Irish SME owners' relaxation habits, no-one regards sex as a method of unwinding anymore.

"The most common form of relaxation is watching TV or DVDs," says the survey, which was conducted by TNS mrbi. "That's 87%. Women directors are more likely to relax with a book than men. 84% of women opt for reading as the main form of relaxation compared to 69% of men."

So the women of Ireland prefer a good book to coitus? What is to blame for this fall-off in executive libido? Work and the office, according to O2.

"84% of those surveyed work at weekends, while 69% work at weekends more than once a month," said the report. "39% are contacted by the office at least once a week when on holiday and 21% are contacted every day."

Govt says no TV licence needed for laptops with TV cards, but confusion reigns

"Mobile phones, standard PCs with a broadband connection and laptops with TV cards will not require a licence," said a press release on behalf of Eamon Ryan, Minister for Communications, this evening.

It's still a little confusing, however: if you hook up your UPC or Sky connection to a laptop, does this mean you do not have to have a TV licence?

I went through all of the scenarios in which you require, and don't require, a licence in this article for the Sunday Business Post last year.

Perlico: a textbook example of a misleading broadband ad

Take a quick look at this ad. Are you under the impression that you can buy a broadband package from this company for €6?

If so, would that be because you didn't see the tiny, tiny print which whispered "in a bundle" and which results in the actual price being an altogether less salivating €46?

I honestly wonder why companies put out this type of ad. It makes you wonder what other terms and conditions will be thrown at you in the small print.

The 'white paper' industry: waffle 2.0

Can anyone actually make any sense of 'white papers'? Who finds them to be useful in terms of practical advice? Here is a selection of the latest to be sent to me (I've just put in the intros to save you from the real ugly stuff).

The new information agenda: do you have one?
An information agenda serves as both strategy and tactical roadmap, bringing together the people, processes and technology necessary for a CIO to transform information into a trusted business asset.
-- IBM's white paper library

Converged Service Delivery: the missing in achieving business flexibility
Converged Service Delivery is one of the emerging trends in Service Delivery. Understand from leading industry analysts, Forrester Research, how this model can benefit your business by reading their latest "big idea" report.
-- Forrester (via ZDnet white paper section)

ITIL -- service approach for Siemens Enterprise Communications
The structure of ITIL is evolving from Version 2 to Version 3; understand how the adoption and application of the ITIL framework can add value to your enterprise, and how Siemens is taking the ITIL model and using it to drive portfolio and proposition development, alongside global service delivery capabilities.
-- Siemens white paper section

Joe Higgins: the EU is a load of crap and there's no difference between an MEP and a TD

Back to politics. The second Dublin MEP candidate to provide responses to relevant European questions put by Jason O'Mahony and I is Joe Higgins. Joe avoided answering a few of the questions, which is disappointing (and surprising). He also says that the EU is fundamentally a capitalist conspiracy. Finally, he sees "no major distinction between being a TD or an MEP". A bit odd, to say the least.

But at least he has responded, unlike FF's Eoin Ryan, FG's Gay Mitchell or SF's Mary Lou McDonald, none of whom have even acknowledged receipt of the questions, sent twice.
Finally, Joe provided several paragraphs of his thoughts in addition to his answers section, but little of it addressed the specific questions we put, so I'm only publishing part of it (at the end).

1. European Parliament
Do you support a directly elected Commission President? If so, what will you do as an MEP to progress this?
I am not in favour of an EU President, a new Bonaparte in effect.
In the event that some such institution was attempted to be implemented, who would be eligible to stand? Any citizen or just representatives of the big establishment political parties in the EU? Would it be like the Irish Presidency, the process of electing which is fundamentally undemocratic, with aspiring candidates having to have the support of the establishemnt political parties which can then corner the presidency between themselves.

2. European/foreign affairs
(a) Are you in favour of Turkey joining the European Union?
Just as in the case of the recent expansion of the EU from 15 to 27, we raise no objection to expansion.

(b) Are you in favour, generally, of further expansion of the European Union within the next 10 years?
Just as in the case of the recent expansion of the EU from 15 to 27, we raise no objection to expansion.

3. Tax/finance
(a) Do you agree that if Ireland exceeds the European average wealth level, it should be a net contributor to the EU?
Not answered.

(b) Are you in favour of tax harmonisation across the EU? If not, do you support the right of other EU countries to undercut us with lower taxes?
I believe that the taxation level is a matter that should be decided democratically within each State. The current situation of a downward spiral of corporate taxes is not in the interests of working people in any member State.

4. Defence/military
(a) Do you believe that a joint European defence force is a good thing?
I am firmly opposed to the proposals to construct an EU armaments industry and, in essence, an EU army. factors which would be significantly advanced by the Lisbon Treaty.

(b) Should we refuse to trade with countries that are at war or that have poor human rights records?
Not answered.

(c) Are you in favour of Irish troops training and coordinating operations with Nato countries?
We should not have anything to do with NATO which represents the interests of the economic and political elites of the US and major EU countries.

(d) Do you consider Irish companies bidding for Nato military contracts a breach of neutrality?
Not only would I want no facilitation of military contracts, but I believe the obscene EU spending on armaments should be challenged and halted. The waste of resources in both personnel and materials in the creation of weapons of mass destruction is utterly repugnant. Neutrality is a word which has no meaning when it comes to the Irish Government.

5. Telecoms/IT
France has proposed a European law that would give each country’s regulator the authority to shut off users’ Internet services if they were caught illegally downloading movies or music. A vote in the Parliament will take place in six months. Do you agree with this proposed law?
I am not in favour of giving powers to a regulator to shut off people's access to the internet.

6. Election
(a) What are the top three things that you will attempt to do as an MEP that you could not do as a TD?
I see no major distinction between being a TD or an MEP.
For me it is all about being a campaigning representative for working people whether primarily based in Ireland in the Dáil or intervening in the European Parliament. What being an MEP would certainly facilitate is trying to build concrete and campaigning links between Irish and European workers with a view to having a common front against the vicious neo liberal policies being pushed within the EU.

(b) What would you describe as the three most important messages in your EP campaign?
We need to build strong campaigning links between European workers and Irish workers, to link up across borders for their common interests as workers, in the same way as the transnational corporations do.
We need to challenge the thrust of EU economic policy which pushed neo liberalism, the privatisation of public services and enterprises and endorses the race to the bottom in giving subcontaractors the right to import migrant labour to undercut established wages and conditions in various industries.
We need to build a new mass political party of working people, and this on a Europe wide basis, to fill the gaping political vacuum left by the move of the Social Democratic and Labour Parties throughout Europe to the right.

Further position on the EU...
The establishment political parties and the capitalist media would have us believe that the European Union is about peace, love and goodwill to all humanity, that the fundamental aim of the EU is to create a world of peace and justice based on equality and human solidarity.

The reality for me is that the EU is conceived primarily as a major economic unity dominated by powerful  corporate interests whose primary aim is the maximisation of the profits of their giant shareholders. They see the expanded EU, in particular, as a major economic unit of capitalism and a major market. Economic policy within the EU is not dictated by the desire to have a humane and just society but by entities such as the European Roundtable of Industrialists which beings together the major multinational giants based in the EU.